Spring

by: Heather Fawn

A poem befitting of the season that is at long last upon us…..

You break my heart and then restore it with things I didn’t even know existed

Your voice is 10,000 miles away and your breath is digital

You’re in a hot air balloon while the gears of my watch shift loudly

 

Stop you stop I stop this stopped

But it’s still going, independent, no one’s watching the road

I’ve got my hand up your shirt and I’m feeling for your heartbeat

 

In the dark we fumble but it’s not sinister

Icicles melted but the wet spots aren’t cold

Come and let me count the ins of your outs

 

Anomaly like a strange new fruit and I don’t

Really understand but it doesn’t taste bad

And I kind of like the color and the shape of things

 

Spontaneous regeneration, I hardly feel the skin

Pulling taut over scars given months

And weeks to heal, friends chipping into the process

 

You’re going really far away and you might not come back

The same or you might not come back at all

And I love you so much because you’re fucking beautiful

 

It’s not a compliment, it’s an observation and it’s

Hard to tell if your beauty is independent or

Transformative, a continuum in a series of choices

 

I hide you and I hide the edges where they’ve torn

It doesn’t matter so much because I hear the echo

Of the way my heart will lurch when you leave

 

I can’t think about the future

I can’t think about the past

You’re a now and you’re an urgent priority

 

Everything that we’ve learned before was wrong

And everything we’re about to learn is

Going to change everything

 

Please hold my hand

Hold me and hold my hand and

Hold this place in your book

 

I will find a fluency in the nuance you

Insist upon and I will listen hard

To the things you can’t say

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